Saturday, September 17, 2005

September is halfway over and I can't say I am sorry to see it go. This month has been hard. I don't have a positive outlook on life right now. I need hope.
I am struggling with praying right now. It seems like when I need to pray and seek God the most, it is the hardest to do. Of course, I can say the prayers. I am just not doing well at listening in faith for the voice of God.
I am also struggling with community. My community is essential during times of crisis like this. But my human nature is driving me to push them away. Help is alot more welcome when it is optional; when it is required to survive, it is hard to accept.
God, I need you. I need your outlook on life. I need hope that even when I can't figure out a solution, there is one. I need faith in your Kingdom, your power, your glory. I really need help loving, and being lovable.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love you too! Hang in there. Sounds like you're under some type of attack. You are very loveable to me!

Anonymous said...

Heather,
I just found your blog today. I saw the address on your email. I have been so deeply touched by your writings. You must know that I think the world of you. You are a wonderful wife, mom, daughter-in-law. Of course, you feel overwhelmed right now. Just look at your life. Sometimes, when our world is so busy, it's hard to realize that we are so very blessed. I know it is hard for you, not being able to be full time mom, and handle all the childcare needs. But, it does give the rest of us time with the children, time to show you and them how very loved you are. Soon, Darin and Mimi will be well and a regular routine will be possible again. Don't loose faith. You are a strong God-follower and he will be there for you. Love you, Marcia